the big a.h

Obituary for The Big A.H. March 12, 2005 - January 12, 2020 In the heart of Croydon, a place known as "the riches," a bright light, The Big A.H., was born on March 12, 2005. Though his time with us was brief, it was filled with moments that left an indelible mark on all who had the privilege of knowing him. On January 12, 2020, A.H.’s vibrant journey came to an unexpected end as he passed away during a valiant stand in the great Croydon Red vs Blue war, a conflict that defined much of his life. Born to his loving parents, Saddam Hussein, a noted politician, and Rudolph Green, a highly respected bricklayer, A.H. was a unique blend of charisma and mischief from the start. He was predeceased by his father, Saddam, and several cherished family members, including his cousin Jack "The Fold" Fold and friends like Michael Queef Fourhundred and Rosie—each of whom left a lasting impact on his life. A.H. was a product of his environment, graduating from Huckleberry Dickfart's Prestigious Campus of Education before embarking on an adventurous educational journey at Roadman University. Though he chose to leave his formal studies, A.H. continued to learn from life’s most unexpected teachers, including a homeless Irish man who imparted the wisdom of the streets. His career was as colorful and varied as his life, with stints at Costco and as a dog food tester, which cleverly masked his deeper involvement in the underworld. He was also known to light up the stage as a stripper and conduct business as a drug dealer at Pryzm Birmingham. Despite these endeavors, A.H. carried his roles with a kind of charm that was uniquely his own. A.H. was deeply embedded in his community as the Supreme Reverend Jelqer of the Croydon Royal Foreskin Church, a member of the Hate Squad, and the president of both the Average Army Fan Club and the S.G.C.M.B.B charity. His political leanings were underscored by his affiliation as a world-famous Tory, showcasing his commitment to the causes he believed in. Beyond his professional and community engagements, A.H. was a man of many passions. He loved "the grind" and was particularly fond of fit blonde women. His hobbies were as diverse as his personality, ranging from playing "Feed the Fatty" on Roblox to listening to Aphex Twin. Despite his complex persona, those who knew him best describe him as dedicated and loyal, with a penchant for humor and a genuine, if not slightly mischievous, spirit. As we remember The Big A.H., we are reminded of his unyielding dedication to living life on his own terms. He leaves behind a legacy defined by moments of laughter, loyalty, and an unapologetic embrace of his true self. In honor of A.H., the family asks that donations be made to the Nigel Farage Gimp Association, an organization close to his heart. A special message from A.H. to all who knew him—he wanted everyone to know about his application to be Nigel Farage’s gimp, a testament to his ever-present sense of humor and unrelenting spirit. The Big A.H. will be dearly missed but never forgotten. His memory will live on in the hearts of those who loved him and in the stories shared by those touched by his remarkable life.